PART III: LIMITING BELIEFS AND HOW TO OVERCOME THEM
PART III: LIMITING BELIEFS AND HOW TO OVERCOME THEM
Silencing Your Saboteurs And Shifting To Your Sage
CATCH UP ON PART I AND PART II
HOW DO YOU SILENCE YOUR NEGATIVE SELF-TALK & REPLACE IT WITH A MORE ADAPTIVE RESPONSE?
This week, I will share with you practical ways to silence the naysayer voices in your brain and turn situations around into gifts.
EXERCISE # 3: PQ PROGRAM
The PQ program is based on findings from the fields of positive psychology, cognitive behavioural psychology, neuroscience and performance science.
It includes three components:
Mindfulness practice: taking 1-2 minutes breaks throughout the day to practise shifting your brain from SURVIVE MODE (flight or fight response based in your limbic system at the back of your brain) to THRIVE MODE (calm and wise response based in your frontal cortex- region behind your forehead).
Mindfulness practice involves focusing your attention on physical sensations coming from any of your five senses, notice any intruding thoughts non-judgmentally and let go of them then shift your attention back to the physical sensation. Think of the distraction as an opportunity to strengthen your attention shifting muscle.
a) look intently at an object or a scene
b) listen carefully to the sounds around you
c) feel any object slowly or use a scalp massager or feel a feather brushing against your hand
d) Savour your food. Notice the taste, texture and smell
e) Focus on your breath. Notice your chest rising and falling. Label your breathing as inhale-exhale. Label any intruding thoughts and let go of them
The Saboteurs vs the Sage: This program personifies your limiting beliefs. It categorises limiting beliefs into 10 Saboteur characters- your naysayers. The main one is the Judge who is loud in every one of us. It judges you, others and circumstance, always seeing the worst in everything. Personification is a technique to detach these negative voices from yourself and your identity and be able to counter them much easier.
It might be helpful to turn the negative self-talk voice in your brain into a character of your choice, like Mrs Trunchbull (from Matilda) or …
Your Saboteurs live in the Survive region of your brain (the limbic system).
⇒ Take this FREE 5-10 min assessment to discover your Saboteurs. Make sure to read the description of each Saboteur once you get your results in order to understand the origin of each saboteur (mostly from childhood as a survival mechanism to maintain your relationship with your caregiver) and how they hinder you from reaching your full potential.
The Sage, on the other hand, is your true self before your brain was hijacked by the Saboteurs. It reflects your ability to tackle any issue calmly, wisely and creatively and to turn any situation into an opportunity or a gift. The Sage lives in your frontal cortex.
Every time you feel triggered (or hear the Saboteur voice in your head), pause, do your mindfulness practice and switch from SURVIVE MODE ⇒ THRIVE MODE.
Practising this will strengthen the neural circuitry of the THRIVE MODE, making your Sage a much more prominent driving force behind your feelings, thoughts and behaviours than your Saboteurs.
The Five Sage Powers: Once you are in Thrive Mode, you can follow these steps to work through any issue and turn it around into a gift.
a) Empathise: Imagine yourself or the other person (a family member or a colleague) as a child. This will activate your caring instinct.
b) Explore: Put your curiosity hat on to discover why you or others are feeling or acting this way. Seek more information to understand the situation
c) Innovate: Brainstorm as many solutions as you can without evaluating them to turn the situation into an opportunity
d) Navigate: Choose the solution that aligns with your values and purpose. Imagine yourself 5 or 10 years down the road. What would your future self want you to choose now?
e) Activate: Take the necessary action. Predict what your Saboteurs might say to stop you from taking action. This will help you be more ready to face them when they try to hinder you.
In order to determine if this program is helping you, you can measure your happiness score before and after the program by taking this FREE Positive Intelligence Quotient (PQ) Test. It represents the percentage of time your brain is acting as your friend vs your enemy.
If you are interested in this program, you can follow my summary above or read the book and apply it on your own.
Alternatively, you can enrol in the program through Danya who is a certified life coach. Feel free to contact her for a FREE session to discuss if this program is suitable for you (email: danyascoaching@gmail.com).
The six-week program on the app includes the audiobook, short videos, mindfulness practice, guided visualisations, contemplations, tracking of progress, the use of stories and metaphors to explain concepts, daily reflections and pod discussion with your cohort members. These activities in combination with weekly life coaching sessions with Danya will provide you with daily practice to notice when you are triggered, calm down and choose a more adaptive response
This is not enough though. In the coming week, I will share with you ways to challenge limiting beliefs through a reflection process, then replace them with positive affirmations.
SEE YOU NEXT WEEK FOR PART IV
DISCLAIMER: I take no commission from any of the above programs. I am sharing them because I have personally tried them and found them beneficial and I am hoping you would benefit from them too.
Disclaimer: All information provided by Abir Ballan is solely intended for educational purposes and is not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Abir Ballan is a Health Coach and a certified NLP and Time Line Therapy Practitioner. She has a Masters in Public Health, a Graduate Degree in Special Needs Education and a BA in Psychology. She is a children’s author with 27 published books.